Gone East: Just call me expert

March 22, 2004

Just call me expert

One of the most popular archive pages on this blog is a really brief report I wrote last summer about the fact that my brother had seen three moose during one of his hikes in Pawtuckaway State Park.

As a joke about the oddness of the word for more than one moose, I entitled the report "The Plural of Moose".

I never offered any opinion on what was the proper plural of this word. But in comments readers offered facts and opinions of all sorts.

Here's where it gets interesting, it seems that "what is the plural of moose?" is a question that haunts the net world. Every day I get many visitors to this site because they've typed "plural of moose" into Google, and Google generously sent them to me.

Every day, all the time.

I think there's money to be made satisfying this compelling cultural question.

Today I discover that I'm now being quoted as an authority on the question. On the Snowheads discussion forum, "A snowHead" has written, "...according to JackHodgson you may be wrong about the plural of Moose."

I'm now an expert on multiple moose. I wonder if this is how Martha Stewart got started?

Posted by jghiii at March 22, 2004 10:12 AM

Comments

Posted by: MGA on March 22, 2004 11:55 AM

Be careful.. It's not how Martha Stewart got started that's important, it's where she finished...

Posted by: sherman on March 22, 2004 12:39 PM

What? We don't use dictionaries in New Hampshire?

Moose is singular and plural according to my book.

So instead, let's talk about guys who are nicknamed Moose. You know the kind -- big and football playing and stupid. Which allows me to reprint my second favorite Julie Brown song lyrics:

When I need somethin' to help me unwind
I find a six foot baby with a one track mind
Smart guys are nowhere, they make demands
Give me a moron with talented hands
I go bar-hopping and they say last call
I start shopping for a neanderthal

The bigger they come the harder I fall
We love 'til we're done then they're out in the hall

{Refrain}
I like 'em big and stupid
I like 'em big and real dumb
I like 'em big and stupid

What kind of guy does a lot for me
A Superman with a lobotomy
My fathers outa Harvard
My brothers outa Yale
But the guy I took home last night
Just got outa jail

The way he grabbed and threw me, ooh it really got me hot
But the way he growled and bit me, I hope he had his shots

The bigger they are the harder they'll work
I got a soft spot for a good lookin' jerk

{Refrain}

I met a guy, who drives a truck
He can't tell time but he sure can drive
I asked his name and he had to think
Could I have found the missing link
He's so stupid you know what he said
Well I forgot what he said, 'cause it was so stupid

The bigger they come the harder I fall
We love 'til we're done then they're out in the hall

Posted by: Jo Ann on March 23, 2004 07:02 AM

Oh my gosh, this is soooo funny! It is weird what you can find when you "Google" something or someone! And that's too funny that folks are going to you for Moose expertize... of sorts!

With all the different comments, you must pop up on a lot of searches! Hmm... interesting... this could turn into a Six Degrees of Jack Hodgson" game!

I recently "Googled" the Meaning of Life. Now that was entertaining! I don't think I saw your name there, Jack. No, I'm sure I didn't, I would have remembered that. Probably a good thing; that'd be a lot of pressure to answer to. :-)